Hi there. Its been awhile. Life got crazy and then my laptop died so I haven’t been able to write for awhile. I hate doing it from my phone, it just doesn’t feel the same you know?
So here is an update, I’m going to try and keep it as simple as possible because like I said, life has gotten crazy.
August 2019 – Andrew’s therapist suggested we get him tested for autism due to his outbursts at home and at school
September 2019 – I wreck my car and switched from sports car to mom car (still getting used to it)
October 2019 – This is a big one, but you need some back story. So we are going to flash back to July of 2019. Its a Thursday afternoon. I drove Andrew to my home town for his best friend’s (my best friends son, they’ve been friends their whole lives) birthday party at a local park. My friend was just out of the NICU with her son and this was one of her first outings so I was helping her with her daughter so she could sit with the baby since he was still on oxygen. Andrew was playing and running with all the kids while I chased around a 2 year old.
After awhile I hear Andrew yelling for me from across the playground. I look over and he is sitting on the swings wanting a push. I picked up my friends daughter and walked over to him. By the time I got there he was talking to two younger kids and their dad who were also playing on the swings. As I walk up to them Andrew says “That’s my Mom!”. As I look down to greet the dad I hear “Oh hey!” from him. Suddenly I am face to face with Steven, the once boy that was the first love of my life. He and I dated in middle school. He was my first boyfriend, first kiss, first date. He was the first boy I ever loved… We ended on good terms but had gone our separate ways. The last I had heard from our friend Kat, he had gotten married and had kids with a girl we went to high school with. Andrew was completely shocked to find out that this stranger did in fact already know his mom! It was pretty comical! We chatted for a minute and then Andrew and I had to return to the birthday party. We added each other on Facebook later that day. I called Kassy to let her know just how small of a town we lived in for me to run into him. She informed me that he and his wife had split up and that she was kind of interested in him. I had thought “Damn, he looks good” when I first saw him that day, but as soon as she said that they were talking I put the thought out of my mind.
Fast forward again to Late September 2019. Kat was visiting our hometown for a few days. She got a hold of me and we made plans to go out to a local bar and watch a live band play. She had a family dinner that night and was staying with Steven while she was in town. I got off work that Friday night and went home to get ready for our night out. I picked them up at Steven’s house around 10PM because I had to drive to my hometown to get there. We all had a great night listening to music, dancing, and catching up. When I dropped them back off at Steven’s I went in to use the bathroom and we all ended up sitting up and talking until almost 4:30 in the morning! It was a great night!
Kassy went home and life returned to normal… So I thought. It was now the beginning of October 2019. I had gone through my normal routine of getting up and getting Andrew off to the bus for school and got ready for work. I was about halfway through my morning when I checked my phone. I had a Facebook message from Kassy! Here’s what it said… “So. Why don’t you go out with Steven? Just curious? Honestly i think y’all would make the Custer couple ever. Just saying”. My brain went into overload reading it. The first thing I asked her was “Ummm? Where did that come from?”. Apparently it had been on her mind for awhile. I reminded her that he and I had already dated but she wouldn’t take that as an answer. This ensued a conversation(debate) that lasted the rest of the day and well into the evening. I finally asked her if she was giving him the same lecture. She said no not yet but that she was about to. I told her that if she gave him the same lecture I would CONSIDER it. That was enough for her I guess because she sure did hahaha I told her he was going to say the same thing I did. Boy was I wrong…
The next morning I got up and did the usual morning routine. J was living with us and had just gotten home from work so she was awake as well. I left my phone on the charger while I took Andrew to the bus. When I came back, my notification light was blinking. When I opened it I had a message from Steven. He asked me out to dinner. I accepted. We made a date for Wednesday October 9th, 2019.
He picked me up from my place at 6:00PM. We went to the Iron Wok, a Japanese restaurant in the town I lived in. The first few minutes were a little awkward. It had been almost 10 years since we had had a conversation. Once we started talking though it flowed so easy. We caught up on the last 10 years. Most of the conversations we had probably weren’t exactly “First Date Appropriate”, but since we already knew each other we figured what the hell right? We walked across the parking lot to a local bar. We didn’t stay there long, it was to noisy. We drove to a different bar and played darts and talked. We went back to my place and watched a movie. We ended up staying up all night talking. I finally went to bed at 8:30 in the morning. He left at about 8:00AM. He has 2 kids, a boy and a girl with 50/50 custody. Here’s the kicker, this is what told me he was something special, his son… Isn’t biologically his. His situation with his son, is almost identical to my situation with J. Its crazy.
November 2019 – I stepped down and got transferred back to my home town for work. I still lived about 45 minutes away so I stayed with Steven most of the time so I don’t have to commute. J stayed at my apartment with Andrew to keep him on track with school. We all spent Thanksgiving together at Steven’s place with his son’s other Dad and his family as well. We all just clicked. It was so easy to just blend into one big family.
December 2019 – Christmas with the Whole Famn Damily. It was a blast! I worked NYE but Steven drove up to my work to kiss me at Midnight ❤ We met up with my bestie to watch a live band at my favorite local bar when I got off work.
February 2020 – Steven and I’s First (second if you count Middle School lol) Valentines Day. We spent the day watching stupid sappy romance movies. We went to see Dolittle at the theater, and then went to my favorite hometown restaurant for dinner. We planned on going Ice Skating but after dinner we were both so full we could barley move. We rented a Redbox movie and then didn’t really watch it 😉 I gave him a picture frame with the place mat that was on the table on our first date in it.
March 2020 – Now we’re into the beginning of the COVID-19 Quarantine…. Steven and I made the decision that when my lease was up in June 2020 we would move in together. After a couple of weeks the kids all got bored. J was staying with us at Steven’s since Andrew was out of school. After a couple off weeks the kids got bored. J and I started plotting…. It took us one day of planning, and one day of shopping to get everything we needed. It took us almost all night after the kids went to bed to set everything up… We threw them the most amazing Harry Potter themed day!!! Complete with potions, hats, butterbeer, every flavor beans, movies, games, and a feast for dinner. Steven wasn’t thrilled with the amount of sugar but…. He learned quickly after the holidays that when J and I plan something to just roll with it haha!
April 2020 – Andrew turned 7!!! He got a new bike and a new bed set! My best friend and I had a conversation. She had told me a few months back that she would be moving to Alaska to help her Mom who wasn’t doing to well. That much I knew. She has been fighting her Ex-Husband about the parenting plan for her kids (my nephews since they dubbed me Auntie 3 years ago!). Her Mom had gotten a hold of her and needed her sooner than planned. She asked if I would take the boys 50/50 with her ex since she couldn’t take them out of state due to the court case. I told her I would talk to Steven to make sure he was okay with it since we would be at his house. On our way home that day I asked Steven about it. He didn’t even hesitate to say yes. So we began the preparations to add two more children to our household, and my friend had her lawyer draw up the paperwork granting me POA for the boys in her absence.
May 2020 – I took a promotion at work. I turned 25!!! Kassy came home to visit for my birthday! We threw a party at Stevens as it was our last night of “freedom” before we became parents/parental figures of 5 kids!!! That was the last time I saw my best friend…. I don’t think there has ever been a goodbye in my life that hurt so damn bad…. She left her boys with me that night.
June 2020 – Work and kids has been my life. Its been wonderful though. Steven has been laid off due to COVID but I can tell he is really enjoying doing the SAHD thing. He loves getting to spend time with them all day!! He built them Foam Swords out of PVC Pipe and Pool Noodles. I finished moving out of my apartment and moved most of my stuff into storage while we look for a place bigger than Steven’s. 5, sometimes 7, of us in his 2 bedroom house is a little cramped…
July 2020 (so far) – We did a Whole Famn Damily 4th of July BBQ!!! It was a blast! We have been beaching it as much as possible!! I had my first official inspection at work and got a PERFECT score. Life is good!! I need to find Andrew a new Therapist now that we’ve moved home. He’s going to need it for when we move, for when he starts a new school.. Its going to be rough for him and I want to make the transition as easy as possible for him.
Ooof! That was a long one!! Well, you’re all caught up!!! Now that I have a computer again I’ll get back into keeping this updated!! Damn.. I forgot how good it feels to get everything out!! If you made it all the way through my shitshow of a post, Thanks!!!
Being a Mom is HARD 